All over but the shouting.
It's been awhile since I've updated, mainly on account of all the reflective thinking I've been doing about this coming passage into my thirties. I guess most people would consider that I'm officially becoming a grown up.
Which is, as anyone who knows me will attest, utterly ridiculous. I'm not a grownup! I don't own property, I don't have a 401K, I don't balance my checkbook. I barely floss! And I do lots of childish things all the time. I still eat pixie sticks! You really can't be considered an adult if you eat pixie sticks, can you? Or if you watch Saved by the Bell? (Hey, it's on ALL THE TIME. I feel like I'm doing something wrong if I DON'T watch it. Don't judge me.)
I'm sure that when I was a kid I thought I'd have a lot more on the ball by the time I was thirty. I was supposed to be vactioning on Mars with my three kids by now, beaming out to the grocery store when we ran out of Tang and space jerky. Oiling my robot maid on weekends and then walking my clone dog.
I think I figured that a lot of stuff would have progressed further than it actually has. Who would have thought, for example, that after all our progress as a nation we could wind up with such a Dipshit-in-Chief? Or that we'd still be paying attention to what's happening with Bobby Brown? Really, I think we can lay blame for my lack of adult growth squarely on the doorstep of America herself. (Besides, what could be more American than passing the buck?)
But you all know that my life is all about being open to the possibilities. Maybe this August the 29th will dawn on a whole new me, a me that gets enough fiber and eschews processed chemical snacks. A me that recognizes the neccessity of good gum health, a me that saves for a rainy day. A wiser me.
There's a fine line between adult and boring. I'm gonna ride it as long as possible.