The Chronicles Of Jessica

I've decided that there's only a brief window of time in one's life where you can drink alcohol and still manage to feel pretty much the same the next day. For me, it was from about 1995 - 2000. This window has closed, and I must accept that. Now if I drink anything stronger than Coke Zero, the next day I look like and feel like the bathroom floor at Promises.

Last Saturday was my bachelorette party at Lima Lounge on K Street. Seriously awesome ladies were in attendance, and I wore a little tiara on my head. It was actually pretty tame compared to some bachelorette parties I've attended; no one got groped as far as I can tell - unless it was our waiter Enzo (he was asking for it). We had dinner in the upstairs restaurant part and then went down the to dance floor, which was not really so much a dance floor as a "stand around and look hip in time to the music" floor. No one was really dancing! Which I can understand, given that the music was....well, I'm not sure what the music was. If Marcus had been with us, he could have told you. I think it was house music, which just doesn't get people dancing unless they're on ecstasy, I don't think.

Going out dancing isn't what it used to be. When I was in my twenties, and even in college, we went dancing all the time and it was great. We actually danced, I mean our heart rates rose and everything. We used to dance to all the eighties tunes and even older stuff, like CCR and Tina Turner. In fact I strained a muscle in my neck once to "Proud Mary", I was having such a time on the dance floor and had to spend several subsequent days with my head listing off to one side like a Peanuts character. That's dancing! And even earlier this year, on St. Patrick's day, we went to a beer hall out in Maryland and there was this world famous polka band and everyone was there doing the polka, cutting up and having a great time. So obviously people still do like dancing, it's just a matter of all the elements coming together.

Per my last entry, we've grown pretty concerned about our neighborhood and have started thinking seriously about looking for something else next year. This morning nearly clinched it for me. We usually have to negotiate a gauntlet of thugs on our way home every day, but for the most part it's live and let live. We kind of just all don't acknowledge one another. I thought it seemed like a pretty good system. Then today, a group of youngster thugs were passing by me as I was headed to work and they all start going, "You dropped something, you dropped something!" And when I turned to look at what I had dropped, even though I knew I really hadn't dropped anything, they yelled, "DICK!" and laughed like crazy.

Is "DICK" the new "Psych!" I don't get it. And why aren't they in school? Oh, yeah, it's July. Well why aren't they still in bed at eight o'clock in the morning, that's where I was when I was a teenager. I can't handle feeling like an old fogey. When did I become like this old lady up for teen ridicule? I want to smack these kids with my big purse. Hey, I have a MySpace page, I watch "American Idol". Well, no I don't, but my mother does and she tells me what happens on it. I'm down with the young people! I'm hip! I'm with it! I am!

Sigh. I need a nap. What is it, like 3:30? Jeez. Almost time for supper.