I haven't had a diet coke in 2 days, 6 hours and 3 minutes. I'm getting that aspartame monkey off my back, people! So far it's been pretty easy but this could just be the honeymoon phase.
I'm sure this seems like a very drastic step for me to be taking, but I've been doing some research about the chemicals contained in Diet Coke and it's not encouraging. Check this out:
Aspartame/Nutrasweet (aspartylphenylalanine-methyl-ester) breaks down to its poison constituents at 86 degrees (Aspartic Acid 40%, Phenylalanine 50%, and Methanol 10%). Aspartame/Nutrasweet's breakdown products attack the bodies tissues and create Formaldehyde which builds up in the tissues forever.
Your stomach is 98.6 degrees! WTF? Formaldehyde? That. Cannot. Be good. There's just no way it's advantageous to be ingesting this stuff. Except that I love it. I love the crack of the can when you open it, I love its fizzy brown just-one-calorie deliciousness. But I'm going to be strong. I want to have a baby someday and when I do I'd prefer that it incubate in a non-formaldehy-drated uterus. I'm trying to stick to this, so I'm accepting suggestions of other stuff to drink. Here are a few choices I've ruled out thus far:
Yoo Hoo. The taste is okay, I guess, but the name is really too stupid to make any kind of serious commitment to this beverage.
Southern Comfort.This had its chance in college and let me down miserably. VERY miserably.
Grapefruit Juice. Makes my face turn inside out.
Tea. Meh. What am I, English? I mean I know I was BORN in England but I just can't get into tea. What are you supposed to do with the bag afterward? That's what I've always wondered. Saucers have kind of gone by the wayside in these troubled modern times. Are you supposed to fold it up in a napkin, put it on the table, stick it in your purse - what!? And I never know when to have it, anyway. I know there's a proscribed English 'tea-time' but I could never figure out how to account for the time difference.
Iced Tea. Doesn't taste like anything. Makes me have to pee.
Water. Get serious.
In a recent budget meeting the Fidalgos decided to think seriously about giving up cable television, which would mean I would officially have no vices left. Except red meat. And cheese. And wine and beer.
Sigh. It's a slippery place, the wagon. Why else would it be so easy to fall off?
(Oh - and magazines. But they don't hurt anything! Except the environment. Forget this entire post.)
Comments (9)
howzabout "orangina"??? yummy orangey fizzy drink in cool semi-ergonomically correct glass bottle that can be recycled or exchanged for moola in some states.
or a fruit flavored water bev. called "hint" that is refreshing and not sickly sweet...my fav flav is cucumber. you can buy at "whole paycheck"...i mean "whole foods"
then there is always sangria...
Posted by kimber Leigh Nussbaum | April 14, 2008 4:46 PM
Posted on April 14, 2008 16:46
Oh Jess, it should be obvious:
Red Wine. Always. Every night.
The docs say it's GOOD for you.
Look no further.
Red Wine.
Cheers!
Posted by Kristen | April 14, 2008 5:13 PM
Posted on April 14, 2008 17:13
Sparkling water or seltzer water (flavored or non). I get it by the case from Fresh Direct. The Vintage lemon-lime seltzer is $7.99 for a case of 12. TOTAL bargain next to $1.19 for a 2 liter of Coke (which is going up as anything with corn syrup will be...). You could also try YUMMY Orangina or Boylan's products (latter is sweetened with cane sugar) but they both have high calories. My cousin, the super SKINNY one who is like 60 and a size 2... Susannah used to take frozen oj and combine it with seltzer. Take 1/2 of a can of frozen oj and pour it into 3/4 of the seltzer bottle. Obviously don't shake it but just sort of let it settle and swish it a bit. Then pour and enjoy.
Posted by ktb | April 14, 2008 5:28 PM
Posted on April 14, 2008 17:28
Jim and I stopped keeping DC in the house years ago, and only drank it when we went out. Now that I'm pregnant (thanks for outing me, BTW!) I've given up all caffeine and artificial sweeteners, especially the dreaded aspartame. What we've kept in the house since the great Diet Coke Eradication of '06 has been flavored seltzer. The stuff that's just carbonated water and a little flavor. It takes a little getting used to, but it's worth it, and it comes in a whole rainbow of flavors, some better than others. (Advice: avoid the peaches & cream. Ick.) No calories, either.
Now when we go out Jim still gets DC, but I get lemonade or seltzer with a splash of cranberry juice. Better than it sounds.
If you can hold out for a little longer, you'll find that DC actually starts to taste like the crap it is. It really depends on its addictive qualities because without them, it's just malted battery acid. That turns to formaldehyde in your insides.
Posted by Margie | April 14, 2008 5:32 PM
Posted on April 14, 2008 17:32
First of all, sweetie pie, the wagon is easy to fall off, not hard. Now, as for what to do with your tea bag. Should you take up tea drinking, I will give you your Uncle Tim's tea mug. It is made with a little thingie on one side that you put the used tea bag into. No need for a saucer. Cool. I like Stash brand lemon ginger...has a zing to it, and ginger is supposed to be good for the stomach. I am now cutting my flavored non-fizzy bottled water 50/50 with tap water, not because of the chemicals, but because that stuff is expensive! And I just had to pay the feds $3K and almost $1K to the grand state of Maine, on top of quarterly estimated tax. So I am feeling the squeeze. Face it. Everything good is bad for you. Everything. I give up. I don't even think about it, and the only things I research on the computer are things I don't like!
Posted by Auntie Janice | April 14, 2008 10:56 PM
Posted on April 14, 2008 22:56
Baby.
Yes, do that. I've got ten bucks riding on it with Aunt Patti and I've getting very close to losing.
Paul - bang it up 'er, dead 'ard, in a dirty stylie, right up to the makers nameplate, there's a good fellow.
Drink.
Tea. How can you abandon your heritage with such scorn ... a bag of all things!?! The English drink tea, made in a teapot with tea leaves and served through a strainer. I despair of you sometimes Jessica, I really do.
Iced Tea? Snapple? Rabbit abortionists? Mmm, my favourite.
And i don't know what Yoo Hoo is. Over here, it's glue.
Posted by Charles | April 15, 2008 3:59 AM
Posted on April 15, 2008 03:59
Phoebe and I suggest tea...again. Having lived here for some time now, we've noticed that ANY time is tea time. This includes time when one should, say, be working or paying attention to customers.
Obviously it's a powerful beverage (says Phoebe) if it can keep an entire country from functioning efficiently.
On the other hand you could start smoking. I mean, if you're looking for a healthy option...you might as well stop eating and drinking all together. With all our chemically enhanced, blah blah blah. You could just mummify yourself. It works for Michael Jackson and Paris Hilton.
Posted by Jeremy und Phoebe | April 15, 2008 8:53 AM
Posted on April 15, 2008 08:53
Water is your friend. Learn to love it.
And tea bags should always go to a compost, or on your eyes during a bath. Hey, it's a good excuse to have one.....
Posted by Juanita | April 15, 2008 10:42 AM
Posted on April 15, 2008 10:42
HOnestly, Charles, you need a good spanking! Southern Comfort...I once got very drunk on Southern Comfort Manhattans at UMaine and woke up the next morning and thouht I had spoken with Henny Youngman at Pat's Pizza
and as it turns out, I HAD! he had done stand-up at UMaine and was at Pat's getting a taste of the local color, of which I guess I was a sizeable part! Auntie P
Posted by Auntie Patti | April 17, 2008 7:54 PM
Posted on April 17, 2008 19:54